Central Universe System

My previous Yoga teacher (the one before Swami Shyam Lal, a.k.a India's answer to Kris Kringle) said once "this position is for to benefit the central universe system" but then corrected himself and said "central nervous system" - I think I prefer the first version.

Well, it's true, like that old saying goes "7 days without prayer makes one week", 2 days without Yoga practice makes for a shamefully, disgraceful Tree pose. I thought I was going to knock over the gal on the next mat, Sarah, (fellow Team Canada friend and Ashram escapee).

Though I managed to do this one pose, and hold the position for one-one-millionith of a nano-second, which I thought was pretty good. Heck if I could remember what that pose is called but it's somewhere between 'peacock' and 'you've got to be kidding me'. It involves lifting and holding your entire body weight onto your arms, as you tuck your knees into your armpits, sort of. Of course, the holding was where I was faltering. Alright, if you want to get picky about it, the lift was no gracious maneoveur either. I felt about as graceful as a NASA Space Shuttle trying to blast off: much like the fire they need to ignite that heap o' engineered metal, I huffed and puffed and nearly blew my own house down. A great deal of wheezing and coughing was to be had as well.

But I did lift of the ground, momentarily. I can't tell you what a major accomplishment that is, considering the amount of chips, chocolate, tea biscuits, Bourbon Cream Cookies, chocolate croissants and sugary chai I've consumed. That's pure white sugar I'm talking about. I'm one step away from free-basing it.

Yes, this is how Eufemia deals with seeing mass poverty around her, she stuffs her face with junk food.

Enlightenment is a gracefully executed hop, skip and a jump away. I can just feel it.

Ah, well, it's a little too cold to feel anything really. My hands are numb and it was so windy at class this morning that my yoga mat kept blowing up to smack me in the arse.

It's hard not to see that sort of thing as a sign, y'know?

The thing is, I still get to look out over Pushkar Lake as I try to do the Triangle pose (I'm supposed to be looking at my hand, but my neck doesn't want to go that way. I'm trying! As that famous muppet Yoda said "Do or not do! There is no try." I wouldn't hire me to be a Jedi knight either. I was trying to use the force this morning in that pose and I nearly landed on my face, with my full body weight behind me.)

I see the temple next to the yoga centre as I balance in standing pose. (Oh, yeah, you think it's soooo easy to stand. You're fooling yourself.) I see the ghats when I turn right. Then I see the German bakery when I leave and all feels well with the central universe system.

This is terrible but the gentleman with the southern drawl sitting at the computer next to me, (who was speaking loudly about all his shopping finds and next stops to be had and giving his friend back in Savannah some relationship advice "Nah, y'all tell her she's crah-zee and she cahn't have it both ways. Tell her she's crah-zee now and she's always been crah-zee") well this fellow had a bit of a freakout because there was a mosquito in here. One. He flailed his arms around, waved his hands and said "Mosquito! Awh my Gawhd, there's a mosquito in heh-re!"

I didn't even move. I just kept typing. Actually, I almost accessed my inner-Commando, the one I didn't even know I had, nearly slapping him across the face and yelling: "Pull yourself together, mister! I need you to be a man about this! You think you can handle that, or am I gonna have to start calling you CUPCAKE?"

I don't know where that impulse was coming from. Maybe I should lay off the sugary chai.

With gratitude to Ayelet, I bow to her spirit as intrepid travelling Goddess extraordinaire and I offer the follwing two quotes:

You are not here to merely make a living. You are here in order to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world, and you impoverish yourself if you forget that errand. - Woodrow Wilson

The worst thing you write is still better than the best thing you didn't write. - unknown.

I love that last one. I think it applies to everything - the worst thing that you paint, sculpt, dance, sing, do - is still better than the best thing you didn't do.

Dhanyavad for reading.

Much friends having in Pushkar too, far away, but much friends. Just breathe, and feel this in your central universe system.