My favourite Tony quotes: "I told my wife I was coming to Italy this time without her, it was a hard winter. My mother was very sick and my wife was looking after her, she was supposed to come with me, but it looked like we wouldn't be able to go at all. Then I realised I could go. Well, it was like I started the Third World War, the yelling, the shouting. But I told them both - 'You have broken my balls!' and came here. It's my tenth time in India."
And, after I told him about the teenager who told me his name was Giorgio Armani, Tony said I should of replied "Yeah, and I'm Napoleon Bonaparte"
From the back of the matchbox at Swamiji's: If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.
!!!!A GIANT MOUSE OR RAT JUST JUMPED OUT FROM BEHIND MY COMPUTER. IT CAME FROM SOMEWHERE BEHIND THE COMPUTER MONITOR AND JUMPED TO SOMEWHERE ELSE BEHIND IT. THERE IS NO ONE ELSE HERE BECAUSE SMART TOURISTS HAVE LEFT. AND THE FELLOW RUNNING THE SHOP IS NOT HERE. YES, IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING, I AM FREAKING OUT BUT I HAVE 20 MINUTES LEFT ON THIS HERE COMPUTER!!!!
Okay. I think I'm calm now. No, maybe not, stomach feels a little queasy. I didn't bother to mention the little tiny mouse that ran all over my hotel room the other night. He didn't disturb me until I thought to look for him, lifted up my backpack and there he was. He made like Speedy Gonzalez for the door. Pardon me, I mean he made for the hole under the door, the one he crawled in and out from. I jumped up and down, which is a really useless thing to do if you're in situation that requires you to remain tranquil and be clear-headed.
Okay, you know what? Now I'm just being stubborn AND stupid. Usually, one will suffice. I'm going. I'll add some more another time. Rats! And did I mention there's bats in the tree next to the hotel I'm trying to move to? Bats! Rats, bats, cobras, camels, cows, tigers, elephants. As far as I can see, the only animal that doesn't live in India is the Beluga whale.
No comments:
Post a Comment